McKenna graduated from BYU-Idaho with a Bachelors in
Scars and loveI have always loved that Mothers day is celebrated on Sunday.
In my mind, it always is a powerful way to show how motherhood is such a special, spiritual calling in life.
This Mothers day in particular a thought keeps running through my head, a different spin on Motherhood that came from thinking about this calling in a more spiritual way. Bare with me as I try to explain it.
Before I became a mother 27 months ago, it was hard for me to truly understand an aspect of the character of my Savior. I had a very real relationship with Him, but there were characteristics of him that I knew he had, but couldn't truly wrap my head around. Like his unconditional love for everyone. Even those who hurt, killed and persecuted him. It was just more than I could imagine and understand. He sacrificed his life for those who were the ones who killed him. He saved those who mocked him, persecuted and caused him great pain. He loved them. Unconditionally. And he loves those that today do the same things but in different ways. Unconditionally.
And me. Such a weak mortal. He sacrificed his life for me so that I can be saved, because of his unconditional love. That love that he has for me and all of mankind, no matter their flaws and weaknesses, has always been overwhelming and I have had very sacred experiences where I have tangibly felt that love that he has for me and it overwhelmed my soul.
Fast forward to the moment I first saw my dear son, my firstborn.
Within moments of his birth, I was overwhelmed with a love I never knew was possible.
When they laid him on my chest and I saw his face for the first time, I was able to glimpse the love my Savior has for me.
It took on levels and amounts I never knew my mortal heart was capable of.
And then 18 months later when I saw my dear daughters face for the first time, my heart and it's capability to love increased by 2, and I once again experienced an amount and intensity of love I never knew was possible.
Before I had children:
I always had a flat tummy,
No dark circles under my eyes,
No stretch marks
Stomach muscles that made that flat tummy rock hard.
Perfectly done hair and make-up.
Never a perfectly flat tummy
Always dark circles under my eyes
Lose skin on my tummy
No stomach muscles
And hair and make-up done sometimes.
But as I look down at my not perfect body, I see perfection that wasn't there before.
Just as the Savior has marks on his hands and feet from his sacrifice of love, I have marks on my body from the sacrifice of my love for my children. I sacrificed my body in so many ways, real ways, for my babies to be born. I have many physical scars that I have to remind me and my children of the ultimate love I have for them. My scars and marks may make my body different, but it shows to me the love I have for my children, just as the marks on the Saviors hands and feet shows to me the love he has for me.
And the non-physical marks. They are also signs of the unconditional love I have for my children. My constant exhaustion, the worry I have for them that they will be ok, the sacrifice of all free time etc. etc. They are also signs that I love unconditionally.
That I am starting to grasp, in a very mortal way, the overwhelming love my Savior has for me and all humanity.
I have always known that the creation of the family (no matter the size) is a representation of the unit of heaven and a way for our Heavenly Father to show to us how much he loves us. Before I was married, I loved my family so much, and it gave me a small glimpse of how much my Heavenly Father loves me.
As I felt the love from and for my parents, it put a new light on the love of my Heavenly Father.
As I felt the love from and for my siblings, it put a new light on the love of my Savior.
As I felt the love from and for my husband, it put a new light on the love of the eternities.
As I felt the love from and for my children, it once again put a new light on the love my Heavenly Father has for me as his special daughter.
Families. Motherhood. Being a wife.
It is all a way for us to grasp the unconditional love from our Savior and Heavenly Father.
And with my signs, my marks, my scars from being a mother,
The unconditional love from my Savior starts to make sense. I sacrificed my body for my children, because I love them. As a mother not only do I start to grasp the unconditional love the Savior has for us, but also the atonement and how broken things (think my body) can be made perfect and beautiful through the love of my Savior. Through love. The completely overwhelming and all encompassing love I feel for my children makes my scarred body beautiful. And the completely overwhelming and all encompassing love our Savior feels for us makes our scarred lives beautiful and perfect.
And everyday I thank my Savior for the opportunity to have my sweet children.
And the opportunity to be a part of a family. To feel the overwhelming love as not only a mother, but as a wife, daughter and sister.
I have learned a lot as a mother.
But I would say the biggest thing I have learned, is about the unconditional love that my Savior has for me as I feel the same unconditional love for my children.
|The crazed look on my kids faces are from extreme exhaustion. Church being right at naptime does that to those kiddos|