Probably about a week ago we had gone to lunch as a family (special treat) and when we were walking upstairs afterwards Ryder and I were in disagreement about whether it was time to play outside or take a nap. As I plead my case to my sweet but very stubborn two year old I said something very stupid, "I said you better come upstairs or I will have to get a new boy." I know this sound terrible but I said it before I thought and all I really wanted was for him to come up stairs without me having to fireman carry him with him kicking and screaming.
Since that day every time he wants to stay outside when we need to go inside, he says, "Mom, you go get a new boy. I will play outside." (him looking as a new boy as a positive)
He has had a hard time going to bed or nap time because he is afraid that he will be replaced by a new boy, he usually says something like, "Mom hold me....I don't want you to get a new boy." Or when we are both frustrated with the sleep situation, he says, "I go to the store and get a new mommy."
I realized the moment I said it that it was the wrong thing to say but now I think he is dealing with abandonment issues. YIKES!

Ryder with a panty liner on his head. He said he, "had a big owee."

As I was pondering how to undo this and I came up with some ideas:
Maybe Ryder needs to spend time in his room with me that doesn't involve falling asleep.
I might need to put him to bed a lot sooner or at least be winding down in his room a lot sooner than no.
He might enjoy classical music.
Do you have any suggestions to get through this latest parenting slump?

Sickness+Motherhood= Rough Day.
Luckily Slim Jim was only scheduled to work for 5 hours today so I had a lot of help this morning. But still I have had several hours where I have had to keep an almost 3 year old from driving me nuts and a recently crawling 6 month old from getting into something she shouldn't. When Slim Jim left for work I told him I didn't know what we would be having for dinner. And I honestly had no good ideas (which is very rare, I usually have more ideas than is useful). At 6:30, I looked in my pantry and saw two cans, and I suddenly was brought back to my childhood. Most Sundays after church in the winter we would have.....


Creamy Vegetable Beef Stew
Equal parts Campbell's Cream of  Mushroom soup: Milk : Canned Beef Stew
Pour ingredients into stockpot and heat until warm.
Notes: I think that Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup is better than off brands especially if you are using it in a soup application such as this. As far as Canned Beef Stews I like Dinty Moore, or Western Family, or you can use Campbell's Beef Vegetable/Beef Barley....Nelly's makes good chilli but terrible stew.
Enjoy with wheat toast, and get feeling better!


I love cooking/eating so many different recipes but when I am sick or exhausted all I want is the simple basics I grew up on.
 

I didn't realize I didn't until lately that when I posted the Butter burner that the link wasn't working. Now it is fixed.

PDF / DOC / JPEG

Dear Al, 
Your post broke my heart, because I know that I have been there on numerous occasions and felt the exact same way.
And My Dear Jo,
Your post gave me hope that it won't always be intimidating to go out without back up.

After I had Boston I felt so over whelmed every time we (the kids and I) went out on our own. I remember telling mom, "I wish they (the hospital) would have told me how two kids safely in the car by yourself, instead of making sure my baby was perfectly strapped in (something that I had been doing for almost 2 1/2 years when she came)."
Well guess what, I figured out my own systems.
When Boston was little I figured out that by leaving Boston in her infant seat and keeping her in the shopping cart. I could with one foot hold onto the cart and with the other one I could anchor myself while I put Ryder in the car. This was an act of mommy acrobatics but it allowed me to get both of the kids in the car without sacrificing one of them to traffic.

Other day Ryder told me, "I am going to drive my mom's car."

Now that Ryder is a little older and Boston is no longer in her infant seat, I have now reversed the order. I have given Ryder strict instructions to put his hand on the gas tank door (this gives him a target to focus on so he doesn't go running in traffic). As I put her in her seat and then secure the buckle, then I grab his other hand and we walk to his side of the car where I strap him in then I start the car (get the ac/heater going), load the groceries and put the cart away.
I think one of the most important things us hermits (aka mommies) can if the shell doesn't fit change it. What failed today if you prepare enough might be a success the next. I like to think over my failures by saying to myself what could I have done/packed/prepared to make this experience easier on my kids and myself? I then make a mental note of those items and the next time we are in a similar situation I try to test out my hypotheses. If it goes significantly better I pattern the future after those preparations if the experience has no change or gets worse, I go back to the mothering drawing board.
Hermits have to have a tough shell. Anything embarrassing your kids actions are more painful to your pride than it is physically painful or annoying to the strangers you are around. People might give you annoyed looks, they might snicker at you and they might not help you at all.
Last weekend when I took the two kids out on my own to get some much needed groceries while Slim Jim was working an 11 hour shift. Ryder kept telling me that we needed this or that (coffee creamer he said, "I need this for my hot chocolate" and the brownie mix he threw into the cart without even asking) and I was pushing the cart in the wrong direction. And as I told Ryder that we weren't getting the brownie mix and we went further down the isle to grab some vanilla pudding an elderly lady chuckled and gave me the sweetest smile. It was like her eyes were communicating, "Good job! I know that this is hard for you but doing okay, just keep up the good work."
At that moment I realized that maybe we don't always need to be a shining example of how kids should behave maybe instead we can be a real example to how no matter how tough we will mill through it. The best thing that we can do for our children is pattern for them how they should behave and sooner or later they will pick it up. Until then don't be too tough on your little ones and especially don't be too tough on yourself. 

Boston's now crawling which means she is always getting into things she shouldn't.

On occasions you might ask your fellow hermits to lend a claw. This last Sunday Slim Jim had to work (after the 11 hour day he had to work a 10.5 hour day, we love our hard working Daddy). I put the kids down for a nap before church but it didn't go according to plan so I had to wake the kids up, run them down to the car and run into church. Before the meeting started I needed to take Ryder to the bathroom so I turned to one of my friends and ask her to hold Boston while we visited the bathroom. Through out the span of the 3 hour church block I had to get the assistance of two other friends (Ryder was sure that he needed to go potty so I was taken out of meetings to only have him dribble a few times).

I have struggled for several years to keep bed clothes on my boys bed.  The top sheets make good capes, the pillow cases are great for carrying loot, and the bottom sheets are "Scratchy, Slidey, and Slippy".
So over the last week I re-evaluated the situation.  I decided that the boys needed a little more knowledge and investment.  You know that old statement, " Teach by example"  I don't believe it for a second!  I have never used my blanket to go bouncing down the stairs.  I believe in firm instructive teaching and also instilling ownership.

So, having said all of that, this week we bought fabric that the boys picked out, and made each boy a pillow case.  Except for #1 because he was happy with his pillow and its case.
Big Man #2 opted for brown, because it would never look dirty.  He also wanted me to make it from a baby blanket that was his when he was a baby.  This is what we ended up with.
 This is left overs from a baby blanket I made for him when he was little.  It is super soft fleece.  He is happy with it.  He also decided to go with a memory foam pillow.
 Little man #3 wanted a bright fleece pillow case, that he could make all by himself.  He did a softness check with his cheek on all of the fabrics.  This one won out. we just cut and tied the edges.
 Little man #4 wanted transformers.  He was so excited when he found this fabric.  I folded the fabric over twice, to make sure there was no raw edges.
 I also used the selvage edge.
I love how their personalities came out in the choices they made.
 #1 wanted the store bought case that he already had- because it looked "cool".
#2 chose something familiar, personal, and practical.
#3 chose something fun, comfortable, and independent.
#4 chose transformers- which he has loved for at least 2 years.
Any way, this was just a fun little project, to help us keep those pillows covered up, and it worked.

My Dear Al,
In response to your post, I know what you are going through.  I have been there.  Believe me, I have been there.  Whenever I see mothers with younger kids at the store, climbing out of their shopping carts, or wrestling them in to the car, or looking half crazed at church, I smile, rub their shoulder and say, "Don't worry it really does get better."
I say the same to you.  This moment is fleeting and sweet.  You may not get to do all the things that you want to.  You may have to do less of the things that you think you should.  But focus on loving and training those little ones, because as they grow up, they become your best friends.  And eventually your little hermit crab shell gets a little bigger.  Soon enough you will be expanding.  Soon enough you will be sharing your love of serving others.  Soon enough.  So now, become a hermit for a while and do what you CAN do.

Recently, we have done a few things that a couple of years ago I thought we would never be able to do.  We went to the lake, with everyone.  No one drowned and no one ran away.  We had 3 hours of peaceful fun.

I also took the kids in to Minneapolis, for a field trip.  We went to the sculpture gardens.  The art work was amazing and the kids were terrific.  I realized that my little hermit crab shell has expanded!  Here are a few pictures from our excursion.  


























I am in a new phase of life.  It is the leave-the-stroller-at-home-and-go-exploring phase.  It is amazing to me that I no longer have to worry that my kids may destroy someone's house.  I can count on them to do their chores, get dressed, feed themselves, make their beds, bathe, brush their teeth, stay with me at the store, be safe at the lake, and cross the street without causing me a heart attack.  I still serve as the reminderer, but it gets done.  My life with 5 is so much easier than my life with 3 was.  Age really did make all the difference.

 When I was a freshman in college I took a Personal Health and Wellness Class, where my Professor James A. Lamph, Ed. D gave us a semester assignment called the Butter Burner, which was 1/4 of the grade.

Butter Burner Assignment Requirement:
To get credit, you must exercise a minimum of 180 minutes per week, a minimum of 3 times a week for at least 30 plus continuous minutes per workout period for the entire semester 6 months. Please note; if you fail to meet the minimum requirement just one time during the week, you will receive a zero. No exceptions.

Without that assignment the best you could achieve was 75% (yikes). As Professor Lamph explained the assignment, I was really nervous I didn't want to fail the class but then I realized that the assignment wasn't really that hard it was just a matter of commitment.

As I have thought about Wellness lately I realized that I needed to implement the Butter Burner in my life. I need to commit to my wellness and fitness. I realize now that without a commitment to exercise I am only committing myself to 75% to health.

The great thing about the Butter Burner is that any type of exercise can count (horseback riding, walking, riding bike, etc.) as long as you are doing it for 30 minutes. And with lots of great exercise programs available on Pinterest you will really be able to do what you think is best for your needs.

I have created a Butter Burner Printout where you can track your exercises and set a reward (as a replacement for the grade, make it something that you would really enjoy).

PDF / DOC / JPEG

If we can commit ourselves to the Butter Burner we are going to be on the road to lifetime wellness.

Scenario 1:
You wake up to screaming kids, the toddler is going through once again another growth spurt and the baby has teeth coming in. You hold them, cuddle them, read them books, fix them breakfast, try and clean up the mess that the toddler made while you were feeding the baby and changing her diaper. You somehow make it to nap time. Once the kids are finally down you go looking in the pantry to find something to eat, by this point your feet are dragging until you see a short blue box in which you know that you will find double stuff comfort. You start with one and that dissipates some of the frustration and exhaustion you feel, then a few minutes later you look down and realize that one whole sleeve has just vanished in front of your eyes. You put it back and try to pretend that you weren't the one that ate it. 1 hour later you feel the crash....
Scenario 2:
You wake up to screaming kids, the toddler is going through once again another growth spurt and the baby has teeth coming in. You decide that you would all feel better if you ate breakfast, you think over your list of quick nutritional breakfasts. You know that today is going to be a challenging so you fit your nutrition for your needs. You sit down and eat breakfast with your toddler, he is glad to have the company at the table and eats a little more than usual. Afterward you cuddle, hold and read books to your kids. You are relieved when the kids go down for nap time, you think about what your family might like for dinner and get your prep work done. While you are in the kitchen you find a piece of fruit and snack on it....

I have come to experience the truth in the adage that, "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day". As a mom of two young ones it is challenging to take time for breakfast when my kids have so many things that they need from me. But when I do I feel better and I have the energy to move forward, with my to do list. When I don't eat breakfast I usually find less than stellar dietary options that fulfill my daily caloric intake but don't give me the vitamins and nutrients that I need to keep up with my life.

Today's Wellness challenge: Make Breakfast.
Today I made one of my favorite breakfasts; sunny side up eggs with toast, sliced cheese, fruit and a glass of milk. It took me less time to cook the egg than unload my dishes (I started on my dishes while my egg cooked). The thing I love about this breakfast is that it has everything I love/need. The egg yokes make a tasty sauce over the cheese and the toast. The banana had the sweetness that I love. And as a bow to my up bringing nothing like a good swig of cold milk.

*note: I am not a dietitian I have simply done research that has lead me to my own dietary opinions.
Now this is a lot of food I know (when I want this and am not feeling really hungry I will have one piece of toast and one egg), but remembering that "breakfast is the most important meal of the day" I can't think of a better meal to eat a lot of food for. This breakfast usually keeps me extremely full until 2 when Ryder is ready to eat lunch. I also have the strength and energy to work hard.

Before I got pregnant with Boston I set the goal of setting patterns of wellness in my life that could be a life style I could continue for the rest of my life. I did pretty good I ate really yummy but good food. I worked out a lot and lost quite a bit of weight (40 lbs.) but once my hips started hurting in the 2nd trimester and I threw up everything I gave up on my goal of wellness. Here I am 1 year later and I am recommitting myself. What does this mean?
1. I am committing myself to get moving. I am going to explain more about this on Monday, I am even going to have a sweet free printable for how to track your exercise time and reward yourself for good behavior.
2. I am going to try and eat less processed foods. I want to make more things from scratch, I think what the Heavenly Father gave us is better for our bodies than anything a scientist can cook up in a lab.
3. Eat healthy breakfast and snacks. Hunger can be the worst enemy of wellness because if you are starving it doesn't seem too ridiculous to eat 2 whole sleeves of Oreos in one sitting.
4. Creating Order and Balance in my life. My stress feeds off the level of distress my home and time schedule, so by getting this in order I am hoping to relieve some stress. 

What it doesn't mean?
1. I am not going to stop eating desserts/hamburgers/gravy/etc., though I am going to be balancing out my comfort eating with exercise and a large consumption of fruits and veggies. I love life but I love life even more with yummy food. I agree with my grandparents that if your not going to enjoy life why in the heck even try and live it. 
2. I am going to take everything in stride, my goal is not to loose 50 lbs. (though it would be nice if it decided to detach itself from me) but to set patterns of lifetime wellness which is a lifetime marathon and not a 2 month sprint.
Please join me! I am working on a giveaway for those that are taking the journey with me. Maybe a few of my favorite healthy cookbooks, a jamba gift card....this is still in the brainstorming stages. But everyone that joins is sure to gain patterns of wellness. If you are up for the challenge please commit below and if you are blogging about it please leave your address below, I would love to be inspired by your journey as I hope that I will be able to inspire you through my journey.

All of the Wellness posts can be found by clicking on the button below:

Buying Fabric Online
Thought I haven't bought a ton of fabric online but between Al and I we have gotten some pretty great deals. Both of us have had great success with ordering fabric through Amazon retailers. I bought a few yards of a few different types of apparel fabric from Fabric.com through Amazon. One of those was the ruffled material that I used to make our skirts for Nae and Bubba's wedding.
Al has bought charm packs, layer cakes and yards of cotton gauze. Both of us have been very satisfied with our purchases.
My favorite part about this is that I can put things in the cart, think about it, take it out and put it back in and I don't annoy my husband or bother my kids sleep schedule.
I love the great deals that Fabric.com has on their knits!
My Sewing Challenge
I love the blog sewinginnomansland.com. I love the rules that she had for her sewing projects when her family was in Timor, as her husband worked for the Foreign Service. She had 15 yards of fabric of cute fabric from the US and after she was done with that she had to deal with the fabric that she could purchase in Timor.
I am so lucky to have so much fabric at my finger tips, but often times my purchasing fabric detracts from completing projects. So I have issued myself a personal challenge.
Rules:
1. No BUYING FABRIC for One Year (Last fabric purchase was June 14, 2012 for the crib sheet)
2. Notions purchases are allowed but only for the projects that are currently on my workstation (because even though I might have a years supply of fabric I know I have no where near a years supply of notions).
3. I will accept donations of fabric, bedding or old clothing from family and friends that would be giving away said items.
Potential exceptions:  Christmas/Birthday presents for the kids. I am hoping not to have to break this for Christmas or Birthday but before I made this goal I hadn't purchased fabric for these events. But I really will try my best not to break it.
Update: I have failed but I am doing an excellent job not over doing it.

What I hope to gain from this:
1. Creativity.
2. Focus: each time I go to the fabric store I find myself planning ahead for ten
3. Perspective: not all people are as lucky as me to have two fabric stores within 5 minutes and 2 more within 30 minutes.
4. Save Enough money to go to LA and visit the fashion district and by fabric $2/yard and $2.50/pound.