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I knew then that I wanted my children to know with such absolute faith that they could do hard things.
Teaching Our Children
One night Ryder woke up in the middle of the night needing to go to the bathroom. Ryder usually falls asleep with the door open for bedtime we don't leave it open because he in the past has woke up and had "parties" which have resulted in dangerous situations because Slim Jim and I were asleep. Ryder takes great comfort to falling asleep with the door open and I take great comfort in it being shut when I am not awake to catch him playing with knives or turning on burners. This night I knew I didn't have the strength to stay awake while I waited for him to fall asleep. So I told him that to keep him safe we would need to shut the door, this was counter acted by crocodile tears and great fear. I didn't know what to do. I thought back to what I had learned from the little girl and I said, "Ryder, You can do hard things and I know that you can do this" He met my confirming message with less trepidation, and softly responded,"I want the door open." I then repeated my desire to keep him safe and with more emphasis than previously I reminded him that he could do hard things. I saw the confidence beginng to swell inside him and together we began to say together, "I can do hard things" All of the sudden, Ryder knew that he could do the hard thing that I was asking, and bolted to his bed exclaiming, "I can do hard things."
The next morning when Ryder emerged from his bedroom he said,"I did it. I can do hard things!"
Reminding Ourselves and Our Spouses
As part of our journey with panic disorder, Slim Jim was unable to travel. This meant for years he was unable to go home. He longed for home and I wish there was some way that I was able to help him. Ryder and I had gone down to attend a family event and when I got there I knew what I should do. Bring Utah to him. I couldn't think of a better representation of that, then a panoramic view of the Wasatch mountains.
The usually are even but the one on the left got bumped by the kids this week, and I was being lazy not wanting to fix it right before I took it down. |
I pulled over in Brigham City and snapped 50 images across the horizon. When I got home I used Photoshop to stitch all of the images together (my computer was hating me but after a while it spit out a 40 inch long image). I cropped it to a 5 inches tall by 35 inches wide. I then cut the images into (5) 5 by 7 images and sent it to Walmart for printing when I picked them up I purchased 5 inexpensive gallery frames. After a couple of minutes and a few push pins I had a part of home for Slim Jim.
When he got home he smiled, and thanked me for bringing him home. This then served as a gentle reminder to him where he wanted to be and that he could do it. A few months later he was able to go home to visit for the first time in years.
A month and a half ago, I could tell Slim Jim was unhappy. We had lived in a temporary place for a permanent amount of time, I knew he wanted to move on. I told him though it was scary we needed to move. He agreed and began to work on transferring.
We have had a few little bumps that might of had us doubt and we have had to remind each other and our selves , "I Can Do Hard Things".
Today as I finish packing our apartment I will both mentally and vocally remind myself that, "I Can Do Hard Things."
I am sure you have times where you might need to do hard things and for you I have made this printable. I know you can do it!
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Love this...it's such a great reminder for our kids and us!
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post. I read it a couple of days ago when I was having a hard day. It was a great reminder for me. I shared it on all my social medial sites on Thursday (the day I was having a hard day).
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for linking up at the Real Family Fun link party! Hope to see you next week.
KC